R.I.S.E.

      Waking up this morning, crawling out of my sleeping bag and thanking the goddess that I woke for another day here, I am reminded that there are countless other people in this city pulling themselves from synthetic bags just like mine. Except theirs are probably not under a roof with running water and heat. I am blessed to be here.
      My time in Memphis has been an extraordinarily fast paced lesson in the duality that plays between darkness and light, and how both can be just as blinding. There are a fair amount of men and women who are homeless living in the forgotten nooks and crannies of Memphis, with a seemingly endless spectrum of circumstances determining their situations. All of them bound by the same instinct we all share, but only the lucky few get to have survival imposed upon them every moment of their lives. (sarcasm)
      Since leaving Standing Rock, we have basically been driving south and distributing extra food, clothing, camping gear, hygienic supplies, and most of the time just cash out of our pockets. It has been striking to meet so many people whose eyes show the deepest sorrows, the oldest traumas, and the cries for help that have been unanswered for so long. Just stopping to shake someone's hand and give them the respect to be listened to has often times been more healing for them than some hand warmers and a jacket. That single moment when they remember that they aren't actually invisible.
      The invisibility effect is actually something that really struck me as a young man, seeing people living on the streets and being practically invisible to everyone who was passing. The night we pulled into Memphis we packed up a big plastic bag full of supplies and our plan was to cruise around town and just sprinkle some light on folks as the need arose. The effect, however, was that we became pretty much invisible to everyone who wasn't without a home and also came a step closer to the people who were.  Folks milling about on their evening in the city, dressed up and ready to party had the obvious notion that Will and myself were also homeless, thus giving us the temporary super power of invisibility.

      None of the probably thousands of people we passed even so much as batted an eye at us, unless they had an instrument in their hands or holes in their stale and dirty clothes. This was startling at first, but quickly I found a really lovely kinship with the salt of the earth, and felt the rift between me and 'normalcy' rapidly increasing. The desire to be a part of the fold was almost non-existent before coming into town, and was certainly eradicated quite quickly once setting foot into the real. But there was something particularly special about those living on the streets, as opposed to those who were just traveling upon them.
      Here lies the point...every single time we spotted someone who the world seemed to painfully bend around, we found an individual who had the truth. Through mumbles and broken words, when we dropped in with that person they would start spilling gems and nuggets that were blowing our minds. Every time we would walk away cracking up and feeling high because we felt like we just been blessed. And I believe we were.
      See, the people who look like they're in a hurry, running to their next meeting or appointment, rocking the fresh threads and keeping it all tied up so tight...they avert their eyes, walk a little faster and suddenly have a whole string of texts to answer on their phone when they spot a homeless individual, not because they are afraid of that person; It's not even because they are repulsed by them. If that was why folks became invisible, then it would actually be a lot more simple to suss out the issue. But the reason is so much more personal, and I will let you know something too...everyone who reads this suffers from the symptoms in some degree. You are not immune.
      The cause of the chasm between the person living on the street and the person walking on the street is simply, and oh-so-complicated, the fear of ourselves. (I'm going to bring it down to the personal, instead of doing you's and them's) If I see someone on the street and I meet eyes with them, I start a conversation, then I could either not listen and tell them I don't have any change, never to see them again I'm sure; or, I could abandon the wall I have built between me and them, listen with my heart, laugh with them, sit and roll a spliff and share a story, give them everything I have because they need it more every single time, and probably learn something from this hidden lotus Buddha growing from the cracks in our city streets.
      Both options result in me getting to where I need to go, but one involves the soul, heart, mind synthesis, and the other is just us running from the shadow once again.  That shadow will most certainly be there around the next corner as well, twice as big and scary.  Have you recognized that these situations are really just living prayers? Maybe try it sometime. You see someone in need and rather than coming up with a sack full of excuses why you don't need to care, remember that there is only one reason why you could. And I'll take one good reason over a heap of excuses any day. What begins to happen though is our senses become heightened, our eyes wake up, our heart emerges as the driver, and suddenly spirit begins presenting itself at every turn.
      I grew up to think the simple choice between Love and Fear was kind of bullshit, mostly, honestly, from the scene in Donnie Darko where that awful bible-thumping lady and Patrick Swayze are making the case for all things being based around Love and Fear. I commiserated with Donnie and pretty much made up my mind right there. Well, I was 14, and remained an idiot and fool for a long time after, and in many ways am still just as foolish.
      But the truth is I've learned some things too. One thing that I know for certain, and I dare to even claim certainty, is that the shadow we see around us is the shadow that lurks within us. Only a complete commitment in this life to walk in our heart's space will offer any hope to the problematic world we seem to be lamenting so much. Stop running away from created fear, turn to face it. If suffering is only a perspective, then flip the switch right now and watch your whole world flip too.